Risks, Regrets, Failures in Life, what do they all mean?
I’ve be known to say that the biggest risk in life is REGRET. You can regret you didn’t do enough, you did TOO much, or you never made a decision either way. Yes, there are a lot of regrets in life, I have my fair share. And some people will say they have no regrets because all their decisions, mistakes, and success have led them to where they are now. Well, no offense, but I don’t think that means they have NO regrets.
My new view is: a regret is only a RISK if you don’t do anything with it. If you simply name your regrets but TAKE NO ACTION to fix it, that makes it a risk and you are playing victim to that risk.
I believe regrets can be beneficial: it makes you reflect on your past and the decisions you’ve made and think whether that was the right choice for you. Sometimes we get into situations where we don’t know our choices or they are too painful to consider in the immediate time frame, but long term might be easier.
For example, I’ve heard from many women that they’ve stayed in a bad marriage for too long, but the alternative seemed too hard. Too difficult to leave their in-laws, too painful for the kids to adjust to, too hard to be alone. They felt that if they leave the marriage, it means they failed. I’ve also heard women say that they wish they never bought such a big, expensive house. The alternative is to sell it, so does that mean they failed?
I have many regrets as well from picking stupid small fights with my husband, to being too complacent at work. My complacency led to being bored, which led to being unhappy, and a bad downward spiral continued until I hit my breaking point. My mission in 2018 was to not have any regrets, to stop playing it small with my work, and embrace every scary, new risk or opportunity. I’m pretty pleased with how I handled this mission as I reflect on this last year.
I went with a lot of new opportunities, and some I didn’t because deep down I knew they weren’t the best option for my work and my family. Yet, there were still some regrets, but I am glad I’ve taken notice of my usual patterns of playing small and taking very small risks in life and with work. I want to continue it into the New Year.
What about you? Think back to your regrets or missed opportunities: how can we change the way we view those regrets and move past them? Once you can acknowledge them, you can start making different decisions with your life, which will help you level up your life in a BIG way.
Here are 3 easy steps toward pushing past your regrets:
1. Get a handle on your money. Look back on how much money you earned and where the bulk of it was spent. This is your reality check! Usually where you think you are spending the most money is not the actual bleeding spot in your expenses. The more you understand the flow of your money, the easier it will be to make decisions in the future. When you don’t know where your money comes from or is going, you tend to make decisions out of fear. BUT when you have clarity over where you stand with your money, you can make all life decisions out of security.
2. Learn the patterns of your decision making process. Are you impulsive and make quick, emotional decisions based on the moment? Do you take a long time to research all your options, analyze every outcome, and then make no decisions because they all seem scary? You can make better, more efficient AND effective decisions when you learn how you think and act.
3. Change it up! If your previous money flow wasn’t working for you, it is time to redirect where you are spending and saving your money. If your previous methods of decisions making have led to regrets, how can you modify your process?
My #1 tip for any type of change is to ask for help. You might need someone else, with an objective view, to show you the patterns you are making and how they can be jeopardizing your future, which naturally leads to regrets. I reached out for help when I started noticing more and more regrets with my work and life. I found an amazing business coach to move me forward. I have a roster on my team of various professionals who can help you. Don’t live with one more regret: reach out for help today to get started on the right foot this year! Let’s talk and see who in my team can help you.
Happy New Year! 2019 is going to be an incredible year!